Wednesday, August 5. 2:13 pm: My brother parades through the door, launches his gym bag behind the counter (go ahead, make yourself at home), and proceeds to work on his handstands in the middle of the store. ‘Knock it off,’ I say, ‘a customer might come in.’
2:15 pm: Customer walks in. I groan. Takes one look at the 6ft2 upside down teenager balancing precariously in front of her, and hastily backs out through the door.
2:21 pm: I realize I’m out of red paint. ‘Caleb,’ I say, ‘watch the store for me. I have go do a couple errands.’ He groans. ‘Fine, so long as you bring me something.’
2:23 pm: Text from Caleb. ‘i’m bored,’ it reads. I roll my eyes.
2:25 pm: Text from Caleb. ‘where the heck are you. hurry up.’ I left four minutes ago. Brilliant. My brother obviously has problems with the concept of time and space.
2:26 pm: I am purchasing some art supplies at Eastward Sales on Union, and remember my brother’s request to bring him something, so I look around for the cheapest thing in the store. I settle on a $.60 carpenter’s pencil.
2:35 pm: I arrive back at the store. Caleb immediately peels.
2:37 pm: I discover his work of art on the computer’s paint program, which he has unhelpfully set as the desktop. Sheer genius, right there. I make a mental note to forgo any further $.60 gifts in the future.
2:25 pm: Text from Caleb. ‘where the heck are you. hurry up.’ I left four minutes ago. Brilliant. My brother obviously has problems with the concept of time and space.
Coffee + keyboard = bad.
You’re possibly the worst person ever! DEAL WITH IT! Caleb sounds like a wonderful person and has a lot to offer the arts here in Saint John. The fact that he throws a spear is a bonus! He likes to have a very balanced life. I heard a rumor that all the paintings at bean books were all painted by her brother. However Caleb would never voluntarily give his paintings to Sarah. I heard that she has him locked in the basement and forced to paint or he will receive no food or water. Once Sarah found out that people would buy Caleb’s paintings she took away all of his food and then provided him with sharpened spoons in order to hunt down mice for nutrition, he also has to collect water from the fog and rain that trickles into the basement (dungeon). He remains alive because of an episode of Man VS Wild that he viewed a week earlier before his confinement. However I believe he is digging his way to freedom, trying to reach the River! Also he can’t use the spoons that he hunts with because Sarah has only provided him with 3 and they are getting dull. In that episode of Man Vs Wild he witnessed how Bear (possibly the coolest guy ever….after Caleb) would attach the teeth of the mice to his own fingers. This is his method of escaping the wrath of Sarah Jones. I believe he is only a few meters from the reversing falls. I imagine Caleb will want revenge…possibly has something to do with Spoons to the heart! Sarah better watch out!
Sincerely,
TheBrainsBehindTheBean
Get back to work, buttbrain.